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Questions, Phones and Questions

2 TOUGH QUESTIONS





Question 1:









If you knew a woman who was pregnant,

Who had 8 kids already,

Three who were deaf,

Two who were blind,

One mentally retarded,

And she had syphilis,

Would you recommend that she have an abortion?





Read the next question before looking at the response for this one.



Question 2:









It is time to elect a new world leader, and only your vote counts..

Here are the facts about the three candidates.





Candidate A:









Associates with crooked politicians, and consults with astrologists.

He's had two mistresses.

He also chain smokes

And drinks 8 to 10 martinis a day.





Candidate B:









He was kicked out of office twice,

Sleeps until noon,

Used opium in college

And drinks a quart of whiskey every evening.





Candidate C:









He is a decorated war hero.

He is a vegetarian,

Doesn't smoke,

Drinks an occasional beer

And never committed adultery.





Which of these candidates would be our choice?



Decide first ... No peeking, and then scroll down for the response.















Candidate A is Franklin D. Roosevelt.

Candidate B is Winston Churchill.

Candidate C is Adolph Hitler.

 

 

Phone Call

-----Rrriiiiinnnnggg,rrriiiinnnngg,

'Hello?'

'Hi honey.

This
is Daddy.
Is Mommy near the
phone?'



'No,

Daddy.
She's upstairs in the bedroom with

Uncle Paul.'



After

a brief pause,



Daddy

says,

'But

honey, you haven't got an Uncle

Paul.'

'Oh

yes I do, and he's upstairs in the room with

Mommy,
right now..'



Brief

Pause.



'Uh,

okay then, this is what I want you to do.
Put

the phone down on the table, run upstairs
And

knock on the bedroom door and shout to

Mommy
That Daddy's car just pulled into the

driveway.'

'Okay,

Daddy, Just a minute.'

A

few minutes later
The little girl comes back

to the phone.



'I

did it, Daddy.'

'And

what happened, honey?'

'Well,

Mommy got all scared, jumped out of bed with no

clothes on and ran around

screaming.

Then

she tripped over the rug, hit her head on the

dresser
And now she isn't moving at

all!'

'Oh

my God!!! What about your Uncle

Paul?'

'He

jumped out of the bed with no clothes on,

too..



He

was all scared and he jumped out of the back

window
And into the swimming pool.
But I

guess he didn't know that you took out the

water
Last week to clean

it.



He

hit the bottom of the pool and I think he's

dead.'

Long

Pause

Longer

Pause



Even

Longer Pause

Then

Daddy says,

'Swimming

pool? ...........

Is

this 486-5731?'

p



No,

I think you have the wrong

number........


Our Yearly Dementia Test-- only 4 questions
> > > 
> > > It's that time of year for us to take stock of our mental
> > > awareness.
> > > 
> > > Exercise of the brain is as important as exercise of the muscles.
> > > As we grow older, it's important to keep mentally alert. If you
> > > don't use it, you lose it!
> > > 
> > > Below is a very private way to gauge how your memory compares to
> > > the last test.
> > > 
> > > Some may think it is too easy but the ones with memory problems
> > > may have difficulty.Take the test presented here to determine if
> > > you're losing it or not. The spaces below are so you don't see the
> > > answers until you've made your answer.
> > > 
> > > OK, relax, clear your mind and begin.
> > > 
> > > 1. What do you put in a toaster?
> > > 
> > > Answer:'bread.' If you said 'toast' give up now and do something
> > > else…
> > > 
> > > Try not to hurt yourself.
> > > 
> > > If you said, bread, go to Question 2. 2. Say 'silk' five times.
> > > Now spell 'silk.' What do cows drink?
> > > 
> > > Answer:Cows drink water. If you said 'milk,' don't attempt the
> > > next question.
> > > 
> > > Your brain is over-stressed and may even overheat.
> > > 
> > > Content yourself with reading more appropriate literature such as
> > > Auto World
> > > 
> > > or Women's Weekly.
> > > 
> > > However, if you said 'water', proceed to question 3. 3. If a
> > > red house is made from red bricks and
> > > 
> > > a blue house is made from blue bricks and
> > > 
> > > a pink house is made from pink bricks and
> > > 
> > > a black house is made from black bricks,
> > > 
> > > what is a green house made from? Answer:Greenhouses are made from
> > > glass.
> > > 
> > > If you said 'green bricks,' why are you still reading this???
> > > 
> > > If you said 'glass,' go on to Question 4.
> > > 
> > > 4.Without using acalculator-
> > > 
> > > You are driving a bus from London toMilford Haven in Wales.
> > > 
> > > In London,17people get on the bus.
> > > 
> > > In Reading,6people get off the bus and9people get on.
> > > 
> > > InSwindon,2people get off and4get on.
> > > 
> > > In Cardiff,11people get off and16people get on.
> > > 
> > > In Swansea,3people get off and5people get on.
> > > 
> > > In Carmathen,6people get off and3get on.
> > > 
> > > You then arrive at Milford Haven...
> > > 
> > > Without scrolling back to review, how old is the bus driver?
> > > 
> > > Answer:Oh, for crying out loud!
> > > 
> > > Don't you remember your own age...
> > > 
> > > It was YOU driving the bus!
> > > 
> > > 
> > > 
> > > If you pass this along to your friends, pray they do better than
> > > you. PS: 95% of people fail most of the questions!
>